Carrying it Everywhere

I'm one of those obsessive readers who carries her book everywhere despite the fact that I know I'll have no time to read it. When I go to work, I take it anyway, and it sits in the passenger seat of my car patiently waiting for a loving caress. There's a comfort in holding a world near, knowing you could plunge into it, sustained by story.

The same has been true of an album for the last week. I put it in my purse as I'm leaving the house, play it in the car, eject it from the car's cd player when I arrive, then put it back in my purse on the off chance that somehow I will find an excuse to play it while I work, or that I might be able to share a song or two with someone. It's a lovely feeling to be treating an album with the reverence I usually treat a book.

The Indefatigable "Bass Butt"

The bass guitar is a beautiful thing. It centers songs that would otherwise fall apart, provides a sturdy foundation for the most intricate or chaotic of songs, maintains a sense of urgency, and keeps things moving along. In some songs it even provides the melody.

And, bass just feels good to play; the strings are substantial (there's no needle-like E string digging into your flesh), the neck and body are smooth and solid, and when you're playing you can feel your whole body become part of the rhythm of the music.

Tragically, bass players have been making themselves look uncool for years due to a condition The Slow Music Movement refers to as "Bass Butt."

Bass Butt |bās bət|: The act of a bass player keeping rhythm with their posterior and simultaneously attempting a dance move.

 

Example: "Oh my gosh, Becky, you can totally tell that Adam is doing some serious bass-butting in this picture."  

A sad remnant of the bass-butting Clayton once participated in.

Though he has largely overcome Bass Butt, Adam Clayton of U2 struggled with this condition early in his career. In the video below, Clayton, as many other self-taught bass-butters, fails to recognize his coolness quotient diminishing at an exponential rate.



At this time the only cure available for Bass Butt seems to be shame...and in Clayton's case, getting clean.


What can YOU do about Bass Butt?

If you are a bass player, practice in the mirror. Even if you can't come up with something better than the Bass Butt, you will have taken the first step in developing moves.

If you are a friend or family member of a bass player who suffers from Bass Butt, take a deep breath. Bass Butt does not threaten the musical ability of bass players, nor does it keep them from being cool when they are not engaged in bass-butting. TSSM does suggest you limit your Bass Butt-er to audio recordings until they've wiped the floor with their Bass Butt habit.

Together, we can eliminate the coolness-harming Bass Butt!


Next edition of Bassists Lacking Awesome Moves (BLAM): the Neck Swing

PS I love Adam Clayton